tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.comments2024-03-13T08:15:43.771+01:00Referee TalesIan Plenderleithhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08512357220650578961noreply@blogger.comBlogger115125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-14467719723394424212024-03-09T00:00:10.159+01:002024-03-09T00:00:10.159+01:00As a fellow referee, I empathize deeply with the s...As a fellow referee, I empathize deeply with the sentiments expressed in this post. Refereeing can be an incredibly challenging and thankless task, especially in emotionally charged youth games where tensions can run high.<br /><br />The author's candid account highlights the immense pressure referees face to make split-second decisions while being subjected to constant scrutiny and criticism from players, coaches, and parents alike. It's disheartening to see how quickly a game can devolve into chaos and animosity, leaving the referee feeling overwhelmed and undervalued.<br /><br />This post serves as a poignant reminder of the importance of respect and sportsmanship in youth sports. It's essential for all stakeholders to remember that referees are human too, doing their best to ensure fair play and uphold the integrity of the game.<br /><br />As a community, we need to work towards creating a more supportive and respectful environment for referees, one where they can officiate with confidence and without fear of abuse or harassment. Only then can we truly foster a positive and enjoyable experience for everyone involved in the beautiful game.Ronny Kreuzberghttps://true-table.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-55459913093097743712023-10-19T09:08:47.555+02:002023-10-19T09:08:47.555+02:00Thank you for all that, AS. I am definitely a happ...Thank you for all that, AS. I am definitely a happier person now for the change of direction. Part of me wonders if I kept it up for so long because of the rich material it provided for the blog (and ensuing book). But although I will continue to write here about refereeing issues, I hope my experiences out on the field will become less traumatic... Ian Plenderleithnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-64946105023932562892023-10-12T19:23:37.545+02:002023-10-12T19:23:37.545+02:00I (more than) feel your pain. Through 1000s of ga...I (more than) feel your pain. Through 1000s of games, I've had to (or been AR to) suspend matches due to violence very (VERY) rarely. However, in the past two months have been issues that have led me to stop (pause) refereeing in two different adult leagues:<br />- Violent conduct that led to about a 25 person mass confrontation (perhaps 5 violent, the rest seeking to pull people apart) as the center suspends the match. The police were called with at least three players liable for criminal charges and one player with injuries (teeth knocked out, shredded half of face) requiring surgery. <br />- Having a player running toward me, after a whistle for his reckless trip from behind, with closed fist screaming at me. Red card pulled out as I back up. As an opponent moves to stand between me and that threatening player, a player off the bench comes in to manhandle the player acting to protect the referee. Another send off for violent conduct. And the third of three send offs in about two minutes goes to the player on the bench, being held back by teammates, screaming a threat to "beat the bloody shit out of you" [me]. Match suspended. I possibly should have called the police. Honestly, was wary and concerned at field as trying to deal with this but the other team and my crew were clear that they were aware and remained alert to potential escalation. Stupidly, the team that had three send offs sent video to the league to "prove" that the referee (me) was at fault. Response back: you're lucky it was only three send offs, the referee was generous considering how bad your team's behavior and actions were. I received two letters of apology from sent off players as if that really means anything.<br />Those two (combined with some other ugliness) have me on an indefinite pause in that competitive men's league.<br />- An adult 'rec' league that I bike to for some evening matches had me looking over my shoulder two weeks in a row due to send offs and team/player reactions to those comments. Most recent in a match with two violent conduct send-offs, the actual more concerning was the 2CT send off with the second caution after the match with the player coming up to demand our names, rejecting referee authority after the match, and saying he was going to report me (Seriously? Make me laugh.) and that the league would "beat your ass". Did I view as serious threat environment? No. Concerned <br /><br />Another league and type of crap that I don't need (and referees shouldn't have) to deal with.<br /><br />Putting aside that professional demands have increased (e.g, willingness/ability to do 15+ matches/week isn't there right now), between college, college club, high school, and high-level youth matches, there are far (Far, FAR) more matches available than hours in the day, no reason to put myself through that crap.<br /><br />Thus, understand your circumstance. Hopefully new regime of 'more coaching' (teams and referees) along with youth refereeing works well for you. I do hope that it doesn't keep you from the blogging as much to resonate with in what you discuss.A Siegelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17153733998025770648noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-64921321176995571132023-09-11T16:21:55.391+02:002023-09-11T16:21:55.391+02:00Of over 2000 matches, I have terminated/been AR fo...Of over 2000 matches, I have terminated/been AR for perhaps five terminated matches. Two of those in the past month:<br />- A relatively calm adult match where, in the 75th minute, in the middle of the field, a player throws (and misses) a punch after having had mild conduct. Out of the blue for refereeing crew (no heard words, seen pushing retaliations, etc prior to this). Players run to retaliate, another player tries to intervene to calm things, and another player runs in and massively punches the player trying to calm things. Within seconds, there are easily a pile of 20+ players right in front of me as AR2. Referee suspends match. We have three clear send offs. The punched player was truly injured (lost teeth, mashed up face -- both likely requiring surgery). We ended up spending 45-ish minutes with the police with all three suspensions potentially facing criminal charges. <br />2. Another rather banal adult match, which I (and my ARs) thought I was managing well. 74 minutes in, a player does a reckless, studs up foul from behind tackle. I whistle and before I can decide which color I'm going and pull a card, the fouling player is up screaming at me w/ugly FAL toward and runs toward me with clenched fist. As I back away showing a red he turns away still screaming at me. Easily 5 of his teammates are heading to me with dissent and challenges, mainly focused on why I wasn't showing a red to an opponent who stepped in to be between the player threatening me and me while screaming "you don't say that to a referee ... you don't threaten a referee .... back off ... stop ..." One of the dissenters goes ugly FAL, another send off. Another player comes off the bench and tries to manhandle the opponent who stepped in to protect me while using FAL toward me and the opponent. Another red. Just as I'm thinking "time to abandon the match", the decision is sealed. From the end of my disciplinary report: " [Sent Off Player #2] continued with loud, public FAL. From the bench area, he looked to (and seemed to be trying to get past NOVA United players trying to restrain him) the referee and yelled "I'm going to fuck you up." With that threat, the referee whistled and signaled for game termination at about the 76th minute mark." Didn't call the police ... though could have.<br />Both of above were same (one open, the other over 30) league. As there is an overload of demand and opportunities (past weeks' matches include NCAA, college club, High School, (moderately?) high-level adult amateur, high-level youth, and some recreational adult in well-managed league), two ugly terminations with direct threats to referee from same league, time to leave them behind (as yet another referee won't work their games).A Siegelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17153733998025770648noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-86188652222629658372023-09-06T07:24:23.846+02:002023-09-06T07:24:23.846+02:00Thank you for reading.Thank you for reading.Ian Plenderleithnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-72203042716695103072023-07-28T16:14:03.488+02:002023-07-28T16:14:03.488+02:00Thank you so much for your stories & happy bel...Thank you so much for your stories & happy belated birthday!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-10279959449547137762023-07-11T14:04:25.151+02:002023-07-11T14:04:25.151+02:00You are following the right team mate!You are following the right team mate!grandrugbyhttps://www.grandrugby.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-23900133016129293132023-02-26T22:46:27.669+01:002023-02-26T22:46:27.669+01:00Thank you! No one's heard from Danny for a whi...Thank you! No one's heard from Danny for a while - I've a feeling that the meltdown at the end of the chapter 'Danny (Part 6)' was the end of his career as a player and coach in this city too.Ian Plenderleithnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-85659664059955657092023-02-24T22:45:52.720+01:002023-02-24T22:45:52.720+01:00Just read your book and really enjoyed it. I was h...Just read your book and really enjoyed it. I was hoping for some morality tale ending with Danny getting his comeuppance. Any update? Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-72178330909292933192023-02-22T03:14:33.852+01:002023-02-22T03:14:33.852+01:00They are rubbish and have marked SAFC to give us n...They are rubbish and have marked SAFC to give us nowt the toeragsAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-66888812813241002372023-02-03T15:55:48.994+01:002023-02-03T15:55:48.994+01:00Sounds like you had a more eventful weekend than I...Sounds like you had a more eventful weekend than I did - and it sounds like one of those stressful games that you're happier about in retrospect than you maybe were during the 90. Sometimes you're not sure if you've had a decent game or not until you get some post-match feedback.Ian Plenderleithhttp://refereetales.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-69336486648875005802023-02-03T05:41:42.315+01:002023-02-03T05:41:42.315+01:00My Sunday evening men's match:
- 30 seconds i...My Sunday evening men's match: <br />- 30 seconds in: serious reckless foul 30 seconds in that I chose to deal with with a stern public "not again" conversation. <br />- 3 minutes in: cleats in slide tackle, taking out the player and not even close to the ball, Send Off <br />- Two more send offs in the match with a total of 13 cautions (four were double caution send offs; only three, neither of the send offs, were for dissent though many more dissent cautions likely were merited).<br /><br />Oh, by the way, with my assignor there to assess me. His only really serious questions after the game were "why didn't you caution" four fouls which I chose, for game management purposes, not to bring out a card. I had been concerned that I was not in control of the match, with all those cards and oral cautions (perhaps as many as there were cards). "No, we knew beforehand that this could be an ugly match. You set your standards clearly, communicated expectations, treated the two teams fairly, and it was their problem that they didn't play to the standards you set."<br /><br />A hard and (too) often unsportsmanlike match on the field in part because these two teams of young men had grown up together and had been playing with/against each other for 15 years on various teams. The match, I learned afterwards, also had some serious betting going on which might have intensified things. Yet, they were laughing/joking with each other before and after the match and, often, even during the match. <br /><br />And, despite that, a good match where coaches and many players thanked me afterwards, the league commissioner came up and told me he's been asking for me on the hard matches and he was pleased with how I'd managed them, and, as above, a good discussion with my assignor/assessor. A Siegelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17153733998025770648noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-72951891152263439362022-12-05T15:01:39.707+01:002022-12-05T15:01:39.707+01:00You should - the touchlines need more sane people!...You should - the touchlines need more sane people! Ian Plenderleithhttp://refereetales.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-10973301697364158882022-12-02T16:28:49.973+01:002022-12-02T16:28:49.973+01:00Sometimes I foolishly consider getting back to coa...Sometimes I foolishly consider getting back to coaching youth football again. Then I read your columns to bring me back to my senses. Thanks for keeping it real. Cheers. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-23699903680555565132022-09-30T16:25:53.518+02:002022-09-30T16:25:53.518+02:00They do it because they see this behavior when the...They do it because they see this behavior when they watch professional games on the television. Until those leagues allow their officials to property sanction for dissent, we're all fighting an uphill battle. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-49737320401098298722022-08-16T04:52:26.025+02:002022-08-16T04:52:26.025+02:00Even Collina got angry on occasion. Don't let...Even Collina got angry on occasion. Don't let it get you down.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-81359396415467795852022-06-24T00:11:43.595+02:002022-06-24T00:11:43.595+02:00I'm a newish ref admin and about to be certifi...I'm a newish ref admin and about to be certified as an introductory-level instructor. (Less experienced as a referee than you, though.) One thing that is clear is that the referees we are on the field have to be extensions and aspects of who we are off the field. Our referee selves can't be things we simply aren't.<br /><br />And sometimes it goes pear-shaped anyway.Matthew Swensonnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-21232714650807231852022-06-23T21:56:57.889+02:002022-06-23T21:56:57.889+02:00The difficulty we often have remembering we are al...The difficulty we often have remembering we are all brothers makes it all the more important when we do.Matthew Swensonnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-44349163374191328762022-05-18T05:09:32.503+02:002022-05-18T05:09:32.503+02:00Absolute respect. Sounds like a beautiful journey ...Absolute respect. Sounds like a beautiful journey home.Warren Ellisnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-73368755132957955422022-04-08T10:55:14.761+02:002022-04-08T10:55:14.761+02:00This comment has been removed by the author.UK Football Schoolhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11258582663251557658noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-21564560016811626712022-04-08T10:54:42.874+02:002022-04-08T10:54:42.874+02:00This comment has been removed by the author.UK Football Schoolhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11258582663251557658noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-77529932589431123362022-03-17T11:11:40.425+01:002022-03-17T11:11:40.425+01:00Definitely sounds like your on something, john!Definitely sounds like your on something, john!Ian Plenderleithnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-61332875642981647362022-03-17T09:05:10.946+01:002022-03-17T09:05:10.946+01:00This post is extremely radiant. I extremely like t...This post is extremely radiant. I extremely like this post. It is outstanding amongst other posts that I ve read in quite a while. Much obliged for this better than average post. I truly value i. <a href="https;//exoticmarijuanastore.com" rel="nofollow">Medical Marijuana<br /></a><br />johnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17927270987295123108noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-90998495306225058302022-03-09T11:15:50.667+01:002022-03-09T11:15:50.667+01:00Your last story reminds me of the time I was reffi...Your last story reminds me of the time I was reffing a boys' tournament in the US on a filthy wet day. In the last minute of the final game (U15 or U17, I think), a player got mad about a throw-in decision and threw the ball away. I booked him for dissent and pointed out that as his team was 1-0 down he'd just wrecked their last chance for an equaliser by wasting the final minute. At the end of the game, the field marshal came over under an umbrella with the paperwork to sign off on the result and the sanctions. "Just the one yellow card at the end there," I said, and he replied, "Yes, it was my son - completely justified." Then when I saw the name he signed, I said, "Wait a minute, you're Bill. It's Ian, xxxx's husband!" I had just yellow-carded the son of my wife's boss. We hadn't recognised each other because of the teeming rain. The players and coaches looked on baffled as we both broke into laughter and hugged each other in the middle of the deluge. Ian Plenderleithnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9039548307416034143.post-42336973182602793702022-03-08T20:18:13.731+01:002022-03-08T20:18:13.731+01:00By the way, that was last game Saturday, 1915 star...By the way, that was last game Saturday, 1915 start. Sunday was supposed to be a rest day, before high school matches in the week, but I got called in to cover a match at the same field with the same field marshall but with a far different environment. U14G who played, needed a referee, and pretty much zero problems with players, coaches, and parents. Even a goal disallowed with a late (sigh, very late) offsides call from my youth official AR only had minor discontent. And, speaking of cards, a man approached me after the game: "It was my granddaughter who got the yellow card [reckless foul from behind that was also a defensive foul stopping a promising attack]. You were right to give it to her and I'll make sure she understands that. Good job out there." Very (very) nice contrast to Saturday evening. A Siegelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17153733998025770648noreply@blogger.com